Out Of Balance and Struggling ... In Relentless Pursuit of Excellence

This time apart has been DIFFICULT to say the least. You never realize how intertwined your life is with your spouse until they are removed for a time.I am not very good at down time. It's why I speak so much on balance. Because I know I need to intentionally pursue it. If you've ever heard me speak, I'll often refer to my husband KC as "the calm to my storm". :) He is chill, easy going, fun, funny, and is not a fan when I leave too slim a margin for rest. And while keeping a fast, kick tail pace in this world is championed, it leaves one feeling worn out and run down if rest is left out for too long. That's my greatest struggle. I want to do it all, see it all, try it all, and experience as much as I can. KC balances me out. So imagine removing that calm voice of reason for 2 weeks.I had grand designs to overhaul my house, clean out cupboards, and organize everything so the time would pass more quickly and I wouldn't have time to miss him or waste a moment. It sounded good. In reality it hasn't exactly played out like that. ;) Picking up the things he does for this family alone has filled my time to capacity. I barely can do the things I normally do let alone organize my house. Oh, the things one learns about herself when life presses in. For starters, I learned that I need to slow down my pace when I'm going it alone. I was thrilled to be reminded that taking on the world is not my job (said tongue in cheek, but embarrassingly an actual realization). The other thing I've learned is that time can be spent on lots of unimportant time filler activities but it doesn't mean it SHOULD be. When the going gets tough, the tough need to be smart about how we use our time.I miss that man of mine. But in the process I'm learning a lot about what it is God means when He says to "Be still..and know that I am God."  Resting in that today.A bit run down, but always....In Relentless Pursuit of Excellence,TRACI :)